In the pit of my stomach

When they say you feel it with your gut, they really mean it. We have a a neurological axis between the brain and stomach, and boy have I become very familiar with it!

I’m nearing about a year battle with gastrointestinal disorders. From acid reflux and esophageal spasms, to gastroparesis and asthma flares from my relfux.

I’ve seen first hand how much your gut affects your quality of life. Now that I’m on a treatment that’s finally working I can finally think and even feel more clearly. It really makes you see how important our relationship is, to what we fuel our body with.

Not being able to eat can really make you feel not quite human. While I envy anyone who can just eat without thought, I bet everything I eat tastes way better to me because I gotta fight for each meal.

It also taught me a lot about trusting in my understanding of my body and advocating for myself medically. Sometimes Western medicine is ready to write you off before they give you time to heal.

Recently my asthma was greatly affected by my acid reflux which in turn, triggers acid reflux. But before I noticed the pattern the doctors were already saying it was just a “new symptom” of my disability. After being on a round of steroids and greatly improving I’m going to say that probably isn’t the case as it wouldn’t have helped then.

But think if I had just taken that and not pushed? I wouldn’t have gotten the steroids! I went into the pulmonary doctor I was referred to and said I think it’s just causing this horrible cycle and you know what?

He was floored that I figured it out! He said it would take more for even professionals to figure it out and explain it all so well. I don’t know if I should be irritated about that or proud but I’ll just take grateful and move forward.

However, I felt guilty when I postponed appointments due to Covid concerns or just needing the day to rest, not run to another pessimistic professional. Which I believe gave me time to better understand the cycle my body was going through and finally time to heal once I got a treatment from really being listened to.

I don’t know what the future holds with all of this but I’m just glad to be on the up swing and happy I’m feeling human enough to write. I’ve missed you all so much!

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